People talk a lot about balance. We think about it constantly and what it means as we move through different stages of our lives. The concept of ‘finding balance’ used to feel more clear cut when we were younger. Take our Bondi chapter. Both working for successful and high paced businesses, child free, living the dream in many ways, but still feeling drained and overwhelmed……finding balance in this chapter felt like making time for a yoga class here and there, keeping fit, limiting work emails at night, that kind of thing. It felt like we were doing a pretty good job at the time, although looking back there was a sense of burnout creeping in that would only truly manifest itself years later.
Fast forward to our Noosa chapter. One year into starting our own business, living in arguably one of the most beautiful and chilled places in the world. We are now parents to a little boy, a beautiful nine year old who is our whole heart. He’s completely changed the way we see the world, ourselves, and what it means to love. Any parent will tell you that balancing work and a family is challenging. But just how challenging, we never could have imagined. The struggle to find balance suddenly feels like a different thing entirely.
At four years old, our son was diagnosed with autism, ADHD, and severe anxiety. (We also have trauma in the mix). It explained a lot about why our journey felt different from what we saw our friends and family experiencing, and how our balance looked a little different. The compassion and pride we feel for the way our amazing little boy moves through the world is hard to articulate. He’s killing it. That being said, our home life has always been extremely turbulent and heightened in a way that is equally impossible to put into words. This is not a blog about our parenting experience, but a note on balance and as the title suggests, it’s a struggle. My brilliant, funny, social butterfly of a child (who incidentally is often missed as being on the spectrum) requires 200% of our focus and energy when he’s with us. He’s more intelligent than most adults and could argue a hotshot lawyer under the table. We have to be constantly on our game to notice sensory overload, potential triggers, brewing meltdowns or even just how to answer that same question for the 50th time in a way that doesn't make him feel like he's too much.
All of which is to say that balance is more elusive than ever. We are both so passionate about Noosa Vibe House - it’s that kind of obsessive excitement that keeps you awake at night and makes you want to work long after you know it’s time to switch off, just because you love it so much. We’re also passionate about staying healthy. Keeping active is a non-negotiable part of our routine, as much for mental health and clarity as for any physical benefit. We’re passionate about our mental health, knowing that our family dynamic places immense pressure on each of us on any given day. And obviously, we’re passionate about supporting our son and making sure he constantly feels loved and empowered as he moves through the world with such grace and courage despite finding so much of it so very hard.
So how do we find balance?
It’s f*kn hard. Haha. But here are a few ways we’ve tried.
We’ve changed our definition of balance. Balance can be found in the tiniest moments, in whatever form we can manage.
We remember to breathe. This is balance.
We take the small wins. They can look very different for our family than for others. This feels like balance.
We try and get in the water as often as we possibly can, even for a few moments.
We are honest about our struggles. We’re getting better at admitting when we’re having a tough time.
Internalising everything is not balance. Sharing feels like balance.
Writing this, letting people understand a little more about what we’re going through. This feels like balance.
